Friday, February 29, 2008

brian izzo i hope you die

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh SHIT!, i hate this mother funker! brian izzo! he rides my bus and he thinks he is cool because hes the oldest kid ever. most kids know stuff about transformers and some shows on cartoon network but this kid is so dumb. he is like 40 and has a beard. i hope he dies of old age this year.
me and kev were just riding the bus to our track and brian comes up to our seat and starts saying he heard that we like to video tape each other shitting! he said shit so loud and tina didnt even hear it. tina is the bus lady. she looks like this guy. so i tell brian the truth that it is for my website and he starts making comments about my shoes. i just got them last week and they are skechers. kev has the same ones but in navy. WHO MAKES FUN OF SOMEONE'S SHOES!?!?
luckily our stop was coming and we got up to leave and just then brian slammed his fist on my shoulder. bill harold who is our friend, but fat saw it and charged towards the bus aisle and hit into brian. and then tina was yelling and kev and me ran for the door, but brian stepped on the back of my skecher and i fell face first into the aisle. i was like kind of crying but i just got up. tina stopped the bus and was yelling at us. fat bill didnt even get in trouble because his dad cheated on his mom last year so he lives with his mom and she works so she wasnt home to yell.
i seriously hope that brian izzo gets hit by a train or maybe like some bears eat him. that would be a great thrill. i am sick of that kid. plus my skechers are like all scuffed up and the back is kind of dirty. here is a picture.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

2 girls 1 cup

omg, i saw the movie. it was soooooooooooooooooooooooo sick. i was like gonna throw up and kev was laughing so hard. at the start of it i was just looking at the boobs, and i think kev was too, but then the one lady was taking a dump! it was sickkkkkkkkkkk. but the boobs were sort of cool.
we watched it on my computer in my room, and my dad was yelling upstairs cuz we were laughing so hard. we turned it off before he came in and just my tv was on and it was the show lost. my dad likes lost and then he sat on my bed and watched the whole show. kev was looking pretty mad, and my dad was asking me why we laugh at lost. WHAT DO U THINK U PENIS!? WE WERE LAUGHING AT GIRLS EATING POOP! LOL. i didnt say that. i said we were laughing at a commerical. he asked me what comercial and i said i dont remember. i think he though something was up. when lost ended he left and kev and i finihsed watching the girls and their cup.
then i got the idea to kind of make our own one and video tape it. kev was kind of grossed by it, but i told him no one would know. HAHA. i took my dads sony camera and kev went into the bathroom. we taped him taking a dump and he was so embarrsed he put a pillow on his face to cover it. i was laughing so hard and then heather knocked on the bathroom door and was like "WHEN YOU FAGOTS ARE DONE KISSING I WANT TO WASH MY HAIR!". i hid the camera and we both walked out. i called her a slut, but she didnt cry. the picture is actually a screen shot of kev's poop.


basic computers!!!!! live from shrewsbury elementary its me!!!!!! i'm in my basic computers class right now with dustin evans and jason r. jason is showimg me some cool sites to link onto my blog. here is a funny site that has funny videos and shit. here is a site that has cool games. and here is a site that has funny pictures. LOL LOL the one on the bottom right looks like jessie yessir! haha. if u dont know who she is go to wikipedia and type in ugly. haha ROFL!!
if you want some more laughs check out this picture of henry g's dad. hes like mexicann or something dumb. sometimes we go to taco bell and it tastes like shit!!!
mr. kortis is our teacher and he is ok, except he's ugly and probably never saw boobs. dustin tried to get a picture of him with a web cam, but like a faggit he blocked it. mr. kortis said he knows heather, probably cause he had sex with her!LOL kortis has a poop beard, we call him "kortis the tortis" cause it looks like a bunch of turtle heads poking out of his face! lol ROFL.
i hope tracy is not bitchzone tonight, cause kev is going to show me 2 girls 1 cup! haha. don't worry you assass, i heard about it!! i will update tonight about the video cause it is blocked at school by some dorkzoids!!! plus today we are having a FUCK CONTEST at lunch!! WHOOP! kevin thought of it.
we say FUCK louder and louder and if someone quits then everyone knows that they suck a dick. if you get caught by a teacher you are still sort of cool too. :) seacrest fucking out!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Mr. Boobs

hey dorkzoids!!! this is our snowman!! mr.boobs. i named him. LOL he is actually a man, but i still thought to name him mr.boobs. kevin liked it but nathan did not. derrick said nothing. he actualy doesnt have boobs he just has a cool head with a hole for a mouth. kevin said he probably eats shit with it. nathan never thinks anything is funny not even mr.boobs or when we made a cool jump for derrick to go off in his bag. the plastic bag i had him in went super fast in the snow and tomorrow after school i am going to try one out myself.
my stepmom tracy schrelin was real ticked at me cause kevin and i had derrick out in the snow. she is a slut. probably. she would be reallllly mad if she knew that me and kev threw some snowballs at him for target practice. so now im grounded for the night and kev was supposed to come over. tracy is sooooooo stupid, i am playing online wii with him anyway!!!
nathan donilo was being a little cry cry dress girl and crying cuz i hit him in the mouth with a ice ball. LOLOL i put a stone from his driveway in it and threw it so hard at his face. ahahahaha kevin was laughing. derrick was crying, but it was probaly cause i accidently left him face down in the snow. i wish a fire would happen at my house while i was at school and tracy is home. maybe derrick, just tracy. and heather.


today is the best day ever because school is closed for snow!, but its the worst day ever because heather is here and so is derrick. I have been watching derrick like all day while my sister is like whacking off upstairs and doing her hair. she probably looks like a skank! LOL.
HAHA, i just tried to let derrick type something for my blog. he's only 1 year old. i set him on my lap, but he just fell face first into the keyboard. he isnt smart. plus he really isnt my brother, he is my stepbrother.
my sister is going to be in trouble again. my stepmom tracy left for work at target and put a pizza in the oven for us. heather should have took it out, but she was too busy being slutty. and the pizza was like totally burned, she ate like one piece and i tried to give my piece to derrick but he doesnt have any teeth really so its hard to bite.
my best friend kevin is coming over soon, and we're going to go sledding at nathan donilos house. heather is going to be home alone if any perverts want to come and attack her! haha. LMAO.
i gotta go cuz i gotta put derricks coat and boots on him and put him in a plastic bag so he is easier to carry over to nathan's house. seacrest out!

Tuesday, February 26, 2008


heather is my sister and is 17. she lives in our duplex . she works at panera bread as a waitress and makes all kinds of crap for people. this is a picture of her. she is the dumb one on the right. usually she looks waayyyyyyyyy more slutty. my stepmom tracy calls her a little whore princess sometimes. my dad doesnt call her that. i call her rude, cause one time i woke up and another boy was in her bed. it was last year during my christmas recess and like everyone was asleep. but everyone woke up when i started yelling for my dad. i was screaming like i had a nightmare and my dad peter ran into the room. that is when he looked at heather and she was trying to find her underwear. LOL! OMG! the boy was eric tessler and he lives right near my best friend kevin. flipper is eric tessler's dog, we almost shot him. eric tessler is 24 years old too, so my dad was really mad. it was a really weird night because i saw boobs, but they werent good boobs and i saw my dad kill someone. my older brother alex and my dad buried him in the infield of manson park. that is right near my house, and this summer jason reger broke his shin when he stole 2nd base and slide right into eric tessler's shoulder. it smelled so bad and our game got delayed. JETER RULZ!!!

Monday, February 25, 2008


hey peeps! my first story is going to be about my best friend ever. his name is kevin mcavoy. he is in my grade and is my friend. he lives on meridian way and that is right outside my track. we always do great stuff and have a good time.
the best story of all time was when this summer we were at his house. we played halo for like a million hours and then we were bored so we went to his basement. his dad has a lot of guns in a case, prolly cause he is really fat and cant run away from crooks. kevin showed me a really big gun and i told him we should shoot it. he said NO WAY! U IDIOT! MY DAD SAYS YOU CANT! i thought he would just be scared of making his mom mad if he broke something in the house.
so we took the gun outside and went onto his deck. kevin has a really nice deck with lots of cool statues and stuff. one of them i never told my dad about cause it has a girl with her boobs showing. LOL! it really does! i searched on-line when my dad was still at work and tracy schleirn was at kohl's. this is the picture i found, kevin's dads boob statue is kind of like that but not as freaky looking. me and kevin both held the gun and pretended we were vin diesel. i told him that we should shoot something to see how awesome it could be. kevin thought it would be ok cause his dad always keeps the guns without bullets. right then i saw the nieghbors dog named flipper. he was just like pooping LOL or something and i thought it would surprise him if i shot him. so i like aimed at him and shot it. i totally missed, but i scared him. it was SOOOO LOUD! he was running like a little baby. me and kev went running into his den and looked out the window. a couple of minutes later we started to hear some sirens and cops. I SHOT A LADY! nobody knew it was us and some other freaks got in trouble. here is a pic.
kev was laughin so hard that he farted really loud, and then we played some grand theft auto with our friend bill. kevin's mom made us some totinos pizza rolls and we ate some, but bill ate most of them, cause he weights like 500lbs!!! LOL i wish we would have accidently shot bill instead of that lady. or maybe just shot flipper.
i have more stories i wanna write but i will write them later. i am gonna talk about when kevin and me smashed frogs with rocks.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

helllo world!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hey people!!!! my name is jeffrey paswick lol i'm 11 years old and live in shrewsbury, new jersey. my address is 21 adams way shrewsbury, nj. i live in a duplex with my dad peter and my stepmom tracy schleirn. tracy schleirn is a lady my dad married after my real mom died while she gave birth to me. her name was lisa. i always thought i killed her cuz i have a big head but my dad said that jesus killed her. there are 3 other kids in my family. my brother alex is 23 and he lives in matawan new jersy. my sister is named heather and she is 17 she lives at home. there is also another boy in my family. his name is derrick and my dad didnt help to make him. he is tracy schleirn's kid and he is only 1 year old. here is a picture of hiM look how stupid his head looks!! lol. hahahahaha
we have a iguana at my house too his name is martin. he is named that because of the hockey goalie. here is a picture of him. pap pap is holding him, last summer my pap pap went to heaven, because he got strucked by lightning at my baseball game at manson park. it was the worst day of my whole life we won the game, but we did not go for ice cream because my pap pap was not alive.
thats everything about me! :) here is a cool picture of a narwhal its my favorite animal in the whole world :) my next favorite is a deer, here is a picture that my dad peter took.